enclosure of trust

by futuramafauzi

fuck. its seems that my doubt is getting clearer as days passed.im just afraid that i can no longer trust the people that i should be trusting. wtf everything's cocked up. when i was younger, i often got my things being borrowed without having me being notified. and when that something is broken or faulty, nobody admits. later on, came the monetary problem. my money got stolen no matter where it is kept. sumed up to more than $50. and now, my phone is missing. not that im the only one actually. my dad and sis lost thiers few weeks ago. i dont know whether it is done by someone or whether genies or devil can really steal handphones for someone. i've only heard of money stolen by supernaturals but not phones. and yes, it all happens in home sweet home.

i wish i can elaborate but its such a shame for me to say so. but anyway, this house is being treated like a void deck by someone. im not gonna say who. why void deck?? cause its where people would be victims of opportunities and where people only come by to rest for a while and move on somewhere. tstv's lyric of our latest song "Control" describes my thought for this person

Control
actions speaks louder than words
but words hurts more than action
and as we all are lost for words
stared long with no reaction
now look after yourself
dont change for the worst
yesterday was a good day
but i am still troubled
to see you moving astray
and to myself i mumbled
now look after youself
youre wild all the while
wild all the while
wild all the while

now, i feel like wanting to start life all over again. avoiding the mistakes and sins that i did and cause. strive on in the things that i am involved in. hope that things were never this way. and now im just tired. felt like sleeping all the way. so that i wont do anything wrong, never to get involved and hope nature takes it course, leaving eveything to god.